Friday, 1 August 2014

My show don't tell

WALT show not tell in our writing We had to record ourselves on audio boo 


A few days ago I started writing this story with Miss Smith, I think it's good and I hope you like it too.

try and guess what feeling this is if you can ?

WILF
I will begin by describing what the characters body felt like.
I will describe what they were thinking
I will leave the audience hanging

His heart was pounding.  He could feel his knees shaking he started to wonder what was coming.  Was it big or small he started to shiver and shake.  Trying to quench his mouth together so it wouldn't find him it felt like it was right behind him.  His blood pressure dropped as he was sprinting he could hear the trees scuffling.  Suddenly something touched him...

3 comments:

  1. Kara, great job! Ooooo you can really feel what the character is feeling. I really liked how you have used some awesome describing words like... quench, pounding and scuffling. I think yo uneed to change the red writing on the blue background as it is quite hard to read. I love the way you have left the audience (me) hanging. I reallly want to know what touched him! Mīharo Kara!

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  2. Thanks miss ill change the colour

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  3. Good work! I like the way that you explained what you were feeling. Can you show me how to do that 'Audio Boo' please?

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